A fulfilling life has little to do with racking up a huge amount of experiences possessions, or “perfect” moments. Rather, it is the quality of those experiences with life, where such quality has everything to do with how present one is able to be; how much one is able to feel into the experience; how deeply one explores the reality and meaning of it; how intimately one can savor it.

A fulfilling life is not about going to as many natural marvels as possible. All of nature is marvelous. How much have you taken in the beauty of a single tree or a single leaf or a single flower? How much have you allowed the experience of its beauty to induce a desire to reflect on the power of life to create stunning realities, seemingly from nothing; the intricacies of life, the interconnectedness?

A fulfilling life is not about visiting as many places as possible. Instead, how present were you in exploring just one exceptional place? How fearlessly were you willing to open yourself up to experiencing a new world, to discovering different points of view, to feeling different effects from new experiences? How receptive were you to soaking up a place, to taking the time to notice the differences, subtle and gross, in architecture, language, and attitude; the pace of life, the mentalities, the ideas?

A fulfilling life is not about owning a great many possessions. Instead, how much can you appreciate the value and creation of one object? How much do you take advantage of its usefulness? How much do you allow its intricacies and abilities to encourage appreciation and inspiration for what the human mind is able to create and accomplish? 

A fulfilling life does not involve having tried a great many foods and drinks. Instead, how present can you be to the single bite of an apple? How much of yourself is given over to its tastes, it’s flavors, the sensations it engenders? Can you taste the soil that it came from? Can you feel the air that circled around it while growing on the tree? The same questions can be asked about biting into a tomato, eating an oyster, or tasting a brisket or a piece of sushi.

A fulfilling life is not about sleeping with a great number of partners or of obtaining some kind of “perfect” partner. Instead, how present can you be with just one partner? How deeply have you allowed yourself to experience your partner? With what determination have you looked into your partner’s eyes? How deeply have you tried to understand who they are? Through what level of commitment? How much have you given yourself over to the experience, allowing passion and attraction to command your body in impassioned intimacy. How capable are you of savoring one touch or just one kiss? 

A fulfilling life is not one that merely gets through it. Instead, how much have you sat with the individual life that you are, to do nothing but be in your body, feeling its vitality. Instead of looking for that person who will love you unconditionally, how much have you appreciated your own body’s relentless effort at keeping you alive; your body’s own unconditional love for you: Your heart pumping constantly, every second of every day, non-stop, through the night? How much have you sat with your breath, feeling into your body’s desire to take in the air that is needed to keep you thriving, so much so that no matter how hard you try and hold your breath, your body will nevertheless induce a gasp for air that rushes into your lungs; your own life force is never willing to give up on you; it believes in the value of your life more than any person ever could. 

In living a fulfilling life, one does not need extreme, high intensity experiences. Nor does one dismiss and denigrate the mundane. The fulfilling life can gain excitement and satisfaction from doing the dishes, dusting the furniture, and vacuuming the carpet as much as going skydiving, surfing, or riding a motorcycle. For there is nothing boring about standing over a sink, breathing, being able to use one’s body to interact with world, to feel the water, to express yourself. The common denominator is the presence of being able to recognize and feel the miracle of the world with which one interacts, and the life that takes it in.

We all want a life that is meaningful, a life that feels and has felt like it has been worth the trouble. To do so successfully, one must be willing to intimately observe and experience one’s life; examining it and experiencing it, experiencing it and examining it, but always from a deep-seated presence, one that is not allowed to be overwhelmed by the emotionality or rationality of past and future irrelevances.